The Top 10 Best Human Hunting Movies
Human Hunting Movies are Feeling Less and Less Like Fiction these Days.
Stars & Popcorn gets a little dark with this week’s top 10 list, as I count down the best human hunting movies. Now, I’m not saying that I condone the concept in general, but I do believe that there are some people out there that deserve to be hunted down and killed for the terrible things they’ve done. Until that day, I’ll have to live vicariously through Hollywood. In order to earn a spot on this macabre list, humans have to be hunted for sport, entertainment, etc. This includes humans being forced to hunt and kill each other for the amusement of an audience. In other words, there has to be some “reason” why they are being hunted. Slasher movies don’t count (that means no Freddy Kruger, Jason Vorhees, Michael Myers, etc). Last but not least, the hunters have to be human as well. I’ll admit, this list of human hunting movies is a bit twisted. Then again, it’s a twisted world out there. So, I’ll give you till the count of ten and then, ready or not, this list of human hunting movies is coming for you.
10. Hard Target
Controversial opinion time: I love Jean-Claude van Damme, but his movies are terrible (save for JCVD). That being said, Stars & Popcorn has a firm policy that not all great movies are good. That’s why JCVD is kicking off this list of human hunting movies with Hard Target. In it, he plays a homeless man in New Orleans that stumbles upon a game of cat and mouse. Businessmen pay to hunt the homeless across the city thanks to a sadistic “game warden” (Lance Henrickson) and his right-hand man (Arnold Vosloo). Unfortunately, JCVD turns out to be the next quarry they intend for their hunt, but thanks to his uncanny ability to do the splits, proves to be a… Hard target. See what they did there, with the title? Anyway, this “classic” action movie was actually John Woo’s first American film. Bet you didn’t know that, and he was probably hoping you didn’t either.
9. The Condemned
I’ll be honest, The Condemned is a guilty pleasure of mine. The reason why? It puts some legitimate effort into the backstories of the characters. The film features the most dangerous and vile convicts (save for former WWE superstar Stone Cold Steve Austin who is falsely imprisoned) from the worst prisons around the world. Their freedom is purchased by a wealthy television producer. They’re not free for long though, as the producer straps a bomb to each of their ankles and drops them on an island to fight to the death. Try to run and boom. Try to remove the bomb and boom. If more than one person is alive after 30-hours and boom. I don’t want to be too morbid, but as far as human hunting movies go, The Condemned has a premise that I would actually be willing to watch in real life. A bunch of pedophiles and rapists forced to kill each other? I’ll get the popcorn!
8. The Belko Experiment
The Belko Experiment just might be the most disturbing entries on this list of human hunting movies. At its core, it asks the question, “Would you kill a person if someone put a gun to your head?” We all know the answer we’re supposed to give, but no one really knows until they’re in that life or death situation. That’s why evil masterminds decide to force a building full of office workers to kill one another or be killed themselves. Locked in with no hope of escape and monitored by surveillance cameras, it’s revealed that the company implanted tiny bombs in each of their necks, that will detonate if they don’t reach the required kill count in the time given. The movie isn’t exactly a workplace comedy, but how many of us have wanted to strangle Kevin in accounting before? The guy always microwaves fish and broccoli in the break room.
7. The Running Man
Good film adaptations of Stephen King’s work are few and far between. Luckily for this list of human hunting movies, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s The Running Man wasn’t actually half bad. It might have been one of the campiest 80’s action movies of all time, but that’s all just part of its charm. In the far off future of 2019, society is crumbling. To distract people from how terrible things are, a series is created where convicts are hunted by Stalkers (basically vicious Megaman villains mixed with American Gladiators). Stalkers are super celebrities in this dystopian future and pretty good at killing people. At least, they are until the Governator becomes their prey. The hunters quickly become the hunted as Arnold carves a path of carnage through the “game.” He got pretty good ratings though.
6. Happy Hunting
If you’re going to hunt people, you’re probably going to need some conspirators to make sure that everything goes off without a hitch. Well, Happy Hunting takes that to an extreme since it takes place in a southwestern town that hunts people at an annual festival. Every year, the town rounds up a number of drunks, drug addicts, and other dregs of society, you know, people that no one would miss, and lets a few lucky citizens get the honor of hunting them It turns out that sometimes people with nothing to lose can be the most dangerous in the world. The hero of the film is an alcoholic that they think will be easy prey. He has other plans though and does his damndest to stay alive. The thing about alcoholism though is that it’s a hell of a thing to kick and going cold turkey sucks. That’s why I prefer functional alcoholism to the full-fledged version.