Ultimate Icebreaker: The Celebrity BBQ Game

A Sure-Fire Icebreaker to Help Introverts Meet New People.

As an introvert I often find myself standing alone in a corner at parties with a drink in one hand and a fistful of chips in the other. It can be hard being social and I used to never have a good way to start conversations with other people, at least not until I discovered the ultimate icebreaker. It’s the perfect way to get anyone to open up and to start engaging with you even if they have no idea who you are. Best of all, it’s a conversation starter with a pretty low risk of offending anyone (unless you’re a total movie snob like me). It’s perfect for parties, first dates, or just making new friends in general. So, what is this magical icebreaker any introvert can use to be the “life” of the party? I call it the BBQ game.

How does it work? It’s simple. The concept is that you’re going to have a fun, casual BBQ and you can invite any 10 (living) celebrities you want. Each gets a plus one and you have to say why you want to invite them. It’s a modified take on the dinner party icebreaker most of us have heard of which traditionally involves any 5 celebrities living or dead. However, my BBQ icebreaker is far superior for a few reasons.

First of all, it’s a BBQ which is automatically less formal than dinner and implies that it’s just supposed to a fun gathering and not a meeting of the minds. This lets the person you’re approaching relax and feel less like they might be judged for their choices. It’s more about who they think would be really fun to hang out with rather than who might be the most important people to sit down with, though the two aren’t necessarily mutually exclusive.

Second, by asking about 10 celebrities instead of 5, it lessens the stress of having to start off with the right pick. It’s still a pretty small number, all things considered, but I’ve found that with 5 choices tend to over think who they want to pick and that can lead to long, semi-awkward silences with the occasional, “oh man, this is really tough” tossed in randomly. It wouldn’t be a good icebreaker if you two never really get a chance to have a conversation. By asking about 10, it automatically lets them go to their knee jerk immediate picks at first. They’ll probably throw out the first 5 or so in rapid-fire succession and then pause to think. At that point, you can start naming a few from your list and they’ll probably respond with “oh yeah, I forgot about them” or “That’s a good one.” Before you know it this icebreaker has lead to a full-blown IRL conversation.

Third, the plus one aspect means you don’t necessarily have to include spouses as separate invites, because they’re (hopefully) included with each pick. Big fan of Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson but don’t want to use two slots? Pick one and it’s pretty much a given that the other would be the plus one. However, if this is the case it should be specified in the “why” aspect of each choice. The “why” is important because it lets you actually get more insight into the person you’re talking too. Do they want Chris Pratt there because of his charity work? Because he was hilarious on Parks and Recreation? Because he’s Star-Lord? Or because “OMG have you seen him shirtless?” Remember, it’s not a justification, because the whole point of an icebreaker is to get to know someone quickly and painlessly, and by the end of their list, you should know if the person you’re talking to is worth continuing a conversation with. If not, the BBQ icebreaker serves as it’s own self-contained conversation.

Just as an example, here’s my current 10 for my BBQ icebreaker. It’s a constantly evolving list based on, well, too many factors to name, but it’s a great example of how the game should be played.

Ryan Reynolds- My Hollywood man crush. He’s handsome and hilarious, both on screen and off. Plus, the guy played Deadpool and his portrayal of the character helped me a lot when I was going through a rough time. So, it’d be nice to shake his hand and thank him.

Jason Momoa– The guy would be the life of the party. He’s a stand-up guy who defends his friends from trolls and just seems like an all around good guy. Toss in the fact that he drinks beers and throws axes for fun and I can’t think of a more interesting celebrity.

Donald Glover– The guy is a neo-triple threat. He’s a hilarious comedian, a solid actor, and an incredible rapper who has his finger on the pulse of society. Glover is bound to be both entertaining and insightful. It would also give me a chance to push for Zazie Beets to be his plus one.

Jeff Bridges– The guy is a national treasure. He seems like he’s the living embodiment of The Dude to the point of even being buddies with the Dali Lama, and anyone who is friends with him can’t be a bad guy, right? He’d be the mellow dude helping to lighten the mood.

Jordan Peele– First of all, I loved him in Key & Peele, so I hope his plus one is Keagan Michael Key (sorry Chelsea Peretti). However, the man is also an incredible director and it would be awesome to talk horror movies with him. Getting to pick his mind would be a blast!

Anna Kendrick– She’s drop dead gorgeous and is just as funny as Ryan Reynolds. Don’t believe me? Check out the video of Blake Lively trying to guess which tweets were by her husband and which were by Kendrick. I’m sure she would crack me up.

Rosario Dawson– For me, Dawson will always be the Queen of the Nerds. She’s been in a ton of comic book movies, speaks Klingon, and even writes comics. Besides, she is one of the most beautiful women in the world. She’s the whole geeky package.

Keanu Reeves– The guy is John Wick, enough said. Seriously though, Keanu is incredibly well-read, selfless and compassionate, and seems like he would be incredibly down to Earth. Plus, with all the “sad Keanu” memes, I kinda just want to give him a hug.

Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson– He’s one of the hardest working men in Hollywood. He’s kind, funny, charismatic, and seems like a good genuinely good guy. Maybe I could get a few works out tips from him and hopefully, I wouldn’t have to worry about leftovers if he came.

Michael B. Jordan– Jordan became a more recent addition to my BBQ list when he admitted he has a serious love of anime. It would be great to geek out with him and maybe suggest he play Kaneda in a live-action Akira one day. He seems like the kind of guy every geek dreams of being.

Now, this list is always changing and more often than not I actually forget who my 10 are until I’ve actually started the icebreaker. In the past, I’ve included the likes of Alan Tudyk, Nick Offerman, Bill Murray, and many more. So, you can see that even with 10 slots it’s not always easy to narrow down the choices. Besides, having a loose idea though lets you build off the other person’s guest list ideas and keeps the conversation flowing, so you both aren’t standing there trying to decide.

Of course, it’s not just limited to actors and actresses. I’ve had people put together sports BBQs, hip-hop BBQs, and even political BBQs before when I’ve asked, which is wonderful because it lets you know exactly the kind of person you’re talking to. The BBQ icebreaker is a great way to figure out a person’s passions without resorting to the stale “So, what are you into?” opening line. It also gives you a chance to find ways to connect with a people beyond that and grow the conversation organically.

So, next time you’re at a party where you don’t know anyone or trying to figure out the ultimate opening line to use on Tinder or team building with a new co-worker, give the BBQ icebreaker a chance. It’s a gateway icebreaker perfect for introverted movie geeks like me to approach people without having to force a conversation. Just keep in mind that a person’s BBQ list is different from their Hall Pass list, which is a conversation for another day (or maybe even another article).

That being said, who’s on your BBQ guest list? Leave a comment below with the 10 celebrities you’d invite so I can get to know you better.