The Top 10 Best Horror Remakes
These Horror Remakes Are Scary in All the Right Ways!
This week I’m wandering into dangerous territory as I tackle the 10 best horror movie remakes of all time. Now, I know that remakes, in general, are a touchy subject, with most people succumbing to a frenzied rage when they hear the word. I’m also aware that horror fans are the most passionate of any genre out there. Put those together and this is a list that is bound to upset more than a few people by its very existence alone. Fear not though, because I too am a horror fan, but much less of a traditionalist. See, I like remakes for the same reason so many of us like modern technology. The reason is that just because something happened first, doesn’t mean that it was the best. For that reason, I’ve decided to honor some of the greatest horror remakes of all time for their inventive and unique new takes on classic tales. The only rule is that they have to be remakes of movies and can’t be from the same director (so no Evil Dead 2 or Funny Games). That being said, I’m sure this list will get a few begrudging nods of approval from even the most adamant opposers to horror remakes in general
10. The Hills Have Eyes
Director Alexander Aja kicks off this list of horror remakes (it won’t be the last we see of him on here). Based on the 1977 film from one of the masters of the genre, Wes Craven, Aja sticks to the original underlying themes of the movie while upping the gore factor. This makes sense since Aja was one of the members of The Splat Pack, a group of up and coming horror directors around the beginning of the millennium that specialized in gore. The Hills Have Eyes features a cannibalistic mutant clan in the middle of the desert that sets their sights on a stranded family that enters their territory. The film is supposed to be about how everyone has a monster inside them, but my inner monster never had a hankering for long pig. Still, this is one of the few horror remakes that lives up to the original.
9. Piranha 3D
This movie holds a special place in my heart because it’s one of the first films I reviewed. It’s also one of my favorite killer animal movies of all time. Once more, an Alexander Aja film earns a spot on this horror remakes list with his tale of killer prehistoric fish terrorizing spring breakers at Lake Victoria. What makes this movie so damn good though, is that Aja knows that it’s a pretty stupid premise, but he embraces it wholeheartedly. Piranha 3D features tons of gratuitous nudity and gore but does so in such a way that makes it a hilarious homage to the exploitative horror films of the 70s. Case in point is a scene where two nude models are devoured by the fish leaving only their breast implants behind. The movie also features a cameo from Richard Dreyfuss, who is supposedly playing the same character he did in Jaws
8. The Ring
It’s no secret that some of the best horror movies come from overseas these days, particularly from Asia. That’s why it’s no surprise that one of the creepiest kids in movie history has managed to earn a spot on this list of horror remakes. Back when videotapes where still being used, The Ring put a twist on the whole chain letter concept with a cursed VHS that would lead to the inevitable demise of anyone who watched it. Apparently, the tape is haunted by the malevolent spirit of a girl who suffered a terrible fate at the hands of her parents. Dead and pissed off, she decides to wreak terror on anyone stupid enough to watch her surrealist home video. Of course, The Ring doesn’t quite have the same effect now that VHS has become obsolete. Maybe little Samara can transfer the tape to Blu Ray or something.
7. The Crazies
With all due respect to George A. Romaro, I’m a pretty big fan of the 2010 remake of his horror film The Crazies. Why you may ask? Because it’s one of the few horror films out there where the main characters aren’t mindbogglingly stupid. That’s right, they actually think and come up with fairly rational plans in order to avoid being murdered by their fellow crazed townsfolks. This is such a rare occurrence in the genre that the film is actually what inspired me to put together a list of the best horror remakes of all time. It might not earn the number one spot on this list, but that doesn’t make it any less great. Even if it’s not the best, The Crazies is one of my personal favorite horror remakes.
6. Fright Night
Sure, the original Fright Night is an 80s cult classic, but it’s the 2011 version that earned a spot on The Best Vampire Movies list. So, it only seemed right to include it on this list of the best horror remakes. The film features Colin Farrell as the evil vampire next door, Jerry. He matches wits against an up and coming Anton Yelchin (RIP) who teams up with a pop culture supernatural expert played by David Tennant. What makes it such a great remake is that it’s so far removed from so many of the cliches that we see in vampire movies. However, it still has all the menace and tension to make Jerry one of my favorite movie bloodsuckers of all time. Sure, nostalgia might tell you the original is superior, but I love me some 2011 Fright Night.